Isn't it ironic...

Isn't it ironic... how you can read something that makes you stop and go hmmm, wait a sec.

Before I dive into anything, please note that I'm in a venting mood and I just need a way of getting it out. Hopefully, I can skate around and not pin-point anything imparticular, but not offend anyone while doing so. Like, I said, just a vent and typing it out is a bit therapeutic.

Anyway, my rant... Upon moving here, I had expectations. Huge expectations that were perhaps my biggest problem of all. I had this vision in my head of how things would be. How much greater they'd be and how much happier everyone would be as a whole.

Slowly, my "dream" is disappearing and more often than not, the thought of wishing I didn't move pops into my head. Why? I love Florida. I love that there is a million and a half things to do here. I love that we have the beaches so close. Parks galore. Nature trails. Spray grounds. Theme parks (we haven't taken advantage of those yet, but soon) etc. There is plenty to do here, yet that doesn't seem like enough to me.

Sure, I was eager to leave WV. I miss my friends tremendously and their sweet kids that were the same ages as mine and I miss the scenery. West Virginia was beyond beautiful, but every location has something great to offer. WV - mountains. FL - beaches.

Anyway, I was on that wonderful social network just browsing around and something caught my attention and my thought was, "WTH!" I left it at that. I wont mention it because it's not going to do any good. I just don't understand why things happen the way they do. So, what do I do... I'll hide. I'll back away. I'll build a wall. It's what I do. It's the way that I deal with things. It's not the best way of dealing with things but it's how I deal with them. I am horrible at communication and I wish that I was better, but in my mind I never feel that my feelings are worthy of anything so I keep them inside. I vent to a few select few, but never to the person or people who is/are causing me to feel this way.  Over time, I ease up, let my wall come down and just move on. Again, not the best way to deal with things, but it is the way that I do things.

*sigh*

If only people could realize the things that they say and the things that they do affect other people and their feelings. And right now... I'm down and blue and bothered. So, here I go... into my little shell until I feel that I am over it and that I just don't care anymore.



[ by the way, the date has been altered so that it cannot be traced.. muhahaha ]